Zen and the art of child raising

One more old post about the Lakers, a younger Primo, and me the idiot:

It’s the middle of the third quarter and the Lakers 4 point lead has turned into a 9 point deficit in the last 3 minutes. Smush is bringing the ball up looking to the sideline to see if Coach Phil Jackson is going to call time out. This seems like a dumb move since I know he’s not going to call it, the other team knows he’s not going to call it, hell the cheerleaders preening on the sideline know he’s not going to call it. Phil doesn’t call time outs in that situation because he wants the guys on the floor to work it out themselves. He has been like that through all 9 championships, 4 books, and countless wins so he might be on to something.

As I’m yelling at Smush through my computer screen Primo is screaming in the other room. It is close to midnight and he has been having a rough go at it this evening. I have been in and out of his room most of the night and he calms down for a couple of minutes but then winds back up.

Kobe kicks the ball out to Odom for a jumper and 2 points and then the Lakers steal the ball and score again. They are working it out themselves just like Phil knew they would and I think I need a little more Zen in my child care. Primo needs to learn to work things out himself as well. I don’t need to call a time out right now and go soothe him, this is an opportunity for him to expand and learn how to soothe himself. So I watch the game and tell Beautiful “it’s OK, let him work it out” when she wakes up and starts to go get the boy.

After about 45 minutes of Primo failing to work it out himself Beautiful finally gets up, gives Primo his bottle and puts him back to sleep where he sleeps soundly through the night. In the morning She asked me why I let him cry so long and I told her about the Lakers, about Phil Jackson and his Zen coching style. I told her I was letting him work it out, not calling a time out, giving him the opportunity to see he had it in him all along. Beautiful rolled her eyes at me saying rather patronizingly “So your taking your parenting cues from a basketball coach now?” Then kissed me on my forhead and said “You’re an idiot honey.” As she headed off to bathroom I knew she was right. Then I thought: I wonder how John Wooden would have handled the situation.

Part of the Fatherhood Friday group of blogging Fathers and Mothers over at Dad Blogs. Please click on the image to the left to find more great writing from other bloggers trying to make sense of this whole parenting thing

  14 comments for “Zen and the art of child raising

  1. 05/14/2010 at 4:12 am

    It’s better than what I do… I look to WWE to help me raise my kids..
    .-= Eric´s last blog ..Getting Rich At Home =-.

    Portlanddad Reply:

    I’ve had the kid jump on me from the top rung of the ring errr… crib so they are getting their own WWE ideas.

  2. 05/14/2010 at 7:04 am

    Hey, the lakers don’t win every game. Phil knows this. As long as your wife is calling you an idiot, you know you are on to something.

  3. 05/14/2010 at 7:22 am

    That sounds a lot like an interaction between my wife and I. 🙂

    We don’t know unless we try though, right? That’s how I approach my parenting anyway, and Lord knows it leads to my share of “daddy fail”. 🙂

    Keep up the great parenting, and funny stories.
    .-= twistedxtian´s last blog ..Welcome to A Twisted Christian Dad! =-.

  4. carlos
    05/14/2010 at 9:57 am

    what would bobby knight do? That’s a scary thought.

    Portlanddad Reply:

    @carlos and Que: I like that, go into his room, throw the rocking chair, maybe choke him…wait no that is a bad idea too

  5. Que
    05/14/2010 at 11:15 am

    Man, I should work with you. This post goes right along with my last post about how simple we (men) are. That is awesome! Plus you are a Lakers fan. So you are cool in my book. Carlos does bring up a good point, though, about Bobby Knight fathering… very scary!
    .-= Que´s last blog ..PSST…. Ladies, I Have a Secret to Tell You =-.

  6. 05/14/2010 at 12:53 pm

    Maybe you need to pass on the old maxim ‘There’s no I in team.’ hehe. Well writ post.
    .-= Reservoir Dad´s last blog ..Most Mentally Sexy Aussie Celebrity Dads =-.

  7. 05/14/2010 at 2:19 pm

    I have learned that I have to watch games on delay or recorded. Because I live in a house with two ladies. Then I just have to stay away from seeing the scores so it doesn’t get ruined.
    .-= Edathomedad´s last blog ..Where have you been? =-.

  8. 05/14/2010 at 5:00 pm

    If you had asked yourself “what would Bill Belichick do” you would’ve been all set because you would’ve had cameras already secretly installed in the room & you could’ve just spied on the kid.
    .-= Daddy Files´s last blog ..Some Sobering News =-.

    Portlanddad Reply:

    @daddyfiles He has his own sketchy ways but he gets it done.

    Chris (@tessasdad) Reply:

    @daddyfiles – That is awesome!
    .-= Chris (@tessasdad)´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Fun crawling through the tunnel =-.

  9. 05/14/2010 at 7:11 pm

    I still shake my head at your love of the Lakers, but that was a great story.
    .-= Chris (@tessasdad)´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Fun crawling through the tunnel =-.

  10. 05/21/2010 at 2:50 am

    @carlos and Que: I like that, go into his room, throw the rocking chair, maybe choke him…wait no that is a bad idea too

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