Since coming back from the trip to Iowa without the boys Beautiful has worked everyday. While it was nice to get away and have that break it seems like I am right back where I was the days leading up to the trip. I love my boys and enjoy spending time with them but there is almost never a moment when I am not responsible for their safety and well being. What happens as I get worn down is I spend less time doing activities with the boys and they start to fight more and more. That compounds the frustration as I try to wade into the conflict of MINE! Segundo wants to play with Primo and Primo wants to make Segundo scream. They both end up driving me crazy and the timeouts come fast and furious. I know the schedule is not changing anytime soon so there needs to be changes made in the small ways. Changes like getting out of the house more (sometimes difficult when it is cold and raining and Beautiful has the car), planning activities like art projects and building forts, and me getting more exercise so that I have more energy for the boys. The little changes are going to have to be what gets me through this time so that I don’t get burnt out. I know that the schedule is even tougher on Beautiful and that no small change is going to get her through this time. It is getting to the point where a big change is called needed, we just don’t know what that is yet.