Category Archives: Book Reviews

Book Review: Goodbye Pert Breasts: Diary of a newborn dad by Ben Wakeling

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Originally Posted on Book Dads this past Wednesday, please check out this and all the other reviews by dads who love to read and to share that love of books with their kids.


When we first found out we were pregnant I remember thinking that I was ready for this, that I would be good at the whole pregnancy and parenting thing. In all the excitement and shock that was a clear and strong feeling and it was short lived. I quickly went from that inherent blind confidence to self doubt so powerful I wanted to run away. During that time of self doubt my wife brought home a box of books on fatherhood from one of her co-workers and got started reading about what it meant to be a father even during this time of pregnancy. There were informative dry books, or entertaining silly ones but none like the book I was sent recently. Goodbye Pert Breasts: Diary of a newborn dad by Ben Wakeling is that book I would love to have had in those early days. It is a fantastic combination of useful and enlightening information on the 40 weeks of pregnancy told through the hilarious uncouth voice of an interested partner.

The book takes you through all 40 weeks though not really as the whole process starts with you finding out your pregnant around week 4 and finishes with some pro and cons for a number of hot button decisions that new parents need to make. Drugs vs. natural, cloth vs. paper, bottle vs. breast. Wakeling tackles all of these topics with irreverent humor and surprising detail making this a great book for any dad to be. This is the new What to Expect when Expecting for the men out there that like their facts filtered through a lens of  comedy and caring.

While I loved the funny anecdotes and stream of consciousness takes on things like the fetus looking like predator during the early stages, what is really striking about this book is the awareness and sensitivity to what his wife is going through during the process. As fathers to be we all go through our times of self doubt and questioning but even in that process we need to be mindful that there is so much more going on with the moms. Goodbye Pert Breasts does a wonderful job of cluing men into just what their partners are going through and offering timely advice on how to help.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who is expecting a baby, male or female and wish that I had read a book this great when we were expecting. This book is just the right combination of comedy, caring, and curiosity and a must read.

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Bro-Jitsu: The Martial Art of Sibling Smackdown

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Originally Posted on Book Dads this past Wednesday, please check out this and all the other reviews by dads who love to read and to share that love of books with their kids.

My brother and I are a little more than two years apart and my boys are a little less than two years apart. Perfect ages for high quality sibling smackdown potential. Old enough to give the older brother a distinct advantage but not too old to make it completely unfair. There has to be something extra given to the first born and I know that even as my brother grew older and bigger there was still that psychological boundary of being the youngest that kept him from taking over. While reading Bro-Jitsu: The Martial Art of Sibling Smackdown by Daniel H Wilson, PhD I thought back to a lot of the battles my brother and I had growing up and the ones that are playing out now with my boys and will continue to play out for all of us.

The Sibling Smackdown knows no end date and like the introduction of Bro-Jitsu points out, in a world that has “become more safe, more evolved, and much more politically correct” children have not followed suit. Children and specifically siblings are as rough and mean as ever. Raising two boys and looking after various other kids I have seen this first hand and while we try to keep them safer they do a fairly good job of finding danger, or inflicting it on each other.

Young Bro-Jitsu

Daniel H. Wilson, also the author of How to Build a Robot Army, Where’s My Jetpack, and How to Survie a Robot Uprising, breaks down the 126 techniques for Family Domination into three categories: Offense, Defense, and Psychological in his funny, though often times violent book. There has been some talk in reviews about how violent this book is but as a brother and dad of two boys I have no problem with it. Neither of my kids can read and there fore have picked up no ideas from this book and yet they are already doing terrible things to each other. The book is meant to be humorous and those that complain about the violence miss that point. Bro-jitsu is a funny and nostalgic book with great illustrations and even better write ups on the various moves. I would recommend this book for anyone that fondly remembers the sibling battles they had growing up.

During a recent family vacation we sat around the table passing the book and telling stories of the battles we had, and the moves we used to dominate our family. There was talk of car rides where we all did the “Not Touching you” game of putting your hand as close to your sibling without actually touching them. Or the well placed kicks to the back of the heel when walking behind. It was a fun conversation and we picked up some good ideas from the pages of Bro-Jitsu. I hope you enjoy this book as much as I did and I would love to hear the ways in which you tortured your siblings in the comments below.

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Starting chapter books with Primo

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While browsing through the Clatskanie city wide garage sales a couple weeks ago we picked up our first chapter book to read with the kids. Beautiful and I had talked about whether Primo was ready for chapter book and we decided that we would give it a shot and see how he responded. For fifty cents we found the Treasury of Illustrated Classics version of Gulliver’s Travels by Jonathan Swift.

After baths and pajamas we brushed out teeth and then Primo and I climbed into his bed and started the book. I told him that we were going to read a different book without very many pictures, and that it would be more like when I told him stories than when we read a board book. He was excited to get started and said it was a book like Daddy reads. We read the first chapter detailing the ship wreck that leads Gulliver to Lilliput and Primo was inthralled. He asked questions and went back to the illustrations to make sure he was following an when we came to the end of the first chapter he wanted to read the next one. I told him that we would do that tomorrow for bed time and keep going until we got to the end of the book.

We are now 6 chapters into the book, our vacation has made it slow going lately so we have to spend some time catching up on what has happened but Primo loves his chapter book. He likes to pull it out and look at the drawings and tell Segundo who it is and what is happening. He seems to be keeping up pretty well and I am enjoying the time with him at the end of the day. I know that it is never to early to start a chapter book with kids and reading is really important but I think at four years old Primo is ripe for the exercise of imagination required with less pictures and he is really engaging with the story. Hopefully this is the start of more great chapter books shared with my boys.

Part of the Book Dads We Read link up #1. Click on the link to the left to see what other dads are reading with their kids and be sure to add your own post about what you and your kids are reading together.

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Father Fiction by Donald Miller

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In a reprint of the book To Own A Dragon Donald Miller talks about growing up without a father and offers some chapter for a fatherless generation. The numbers tell a sad story of effects of missing fathers and the Father Factor effects area from Prisons to Childhood obesity. In Father Fiction Donald Miller goes through his own story of being raised by his mother and looking for father figures after his father left him and his sister. Having a father that was supportive and most importantly there made it a bit harder for me to relate to that glaring gap in the Miller’s life but it also helped me understand a great deal about what a father gives their children that no one else can give.

Through out his own story Miller also layers in chapters with practical advice to that Fatherless Generation the book was written for. Chapters on Authority, Making Decisions, Integrity, and Self Pity are filled with anecdotes and metaphors teaching those things that a father should be teaching organically. Really these chapters are great for anyone to read, father or not, but it is that shadow of the thing that is so sad. Miller is telling these things that should have been shown, that should have been passed down throughout childhood but have not.

It feels to me like this book is geared specifically for boys, and with Miller’s own experience that would make sense. He writes to girls as well but is most moving and most successful I think in dealing with that father wound in the lives of the boys that never learned how to be men from their absent fathers. In the introduction Miller talks about a movement he has started called The Mentoring Project. The Mentoring Project is a program using churches to help mentor 27 million kids growing up without fathers. By going through the hard stuff in this book and admitting that he indeed needed a father he was able to start to tell a bigger story of change. A goal to make father fiction no longer true.

The Mentoring Project – Rewriting the Story from The Mentoring Project on Vimeo.

I enjoyed this book and really love Donald Miller’s writing. He has a unique way of telling hard truths in a soft unassuming way. He is also very funny and the narrative is peppered with great stories that had me laughing. One in particular in Chapter 13 on Work Ethic, Miller talks about living with another family and wanting more then anything to sleep until he was done sleeping. With two kids of my own I know the pull of this desire and utter foolishness in trying accomplish it. After being jumped on and poked by a one and half year old she cried at the top of the stairs, afraid to go down. Half to the pillow and half to the girls he told her to slide down on her butt but she just cried. He threw a pillow to her and said “Roll! Grab the pillow tight and just roll down!” I would recommend this book if you grew up without a father, I would recommend it if you grew up with a father but would like to get involved with those who didn’t, and I would recommend this book if you are a father that needs a little help reminding you how important your role is.

Popularity: 3%

Book Review: Sugar Milk by Ron Mattocks

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Sugar Milk what dad drinks when he can't afford vodka

How does one go from being a successful, award winning salesman to finding creative ways to trick his new step kids into finishing their milk? Well that is the story that unfolds through the pages of Ron Mattocks’ book Sugar Milk, and what an entertaining and well written story. It is a true tale of a divorced dad treading the waters of internet dating, long distance parenting, job loss, being a stay at home dad, and what it mean to be a father.

The book is broken into chapters, like a collection of essays, that could be taken out of order and still stand on their own but work together to tell a story. While there are funny chapters on dates gone wrong and putting up with office nonsense it was the raw emotion and beauty of a chapter like Going Back where Mattocks writes about going back to Chicago for a Thanksgiving with his boys. The writing is strong and vivid and the emotion is moving. I have come back to read this chapter five or six times now and it still moves me. In there Mattocks talks about being self conscious about not being a writer but anyone that reads this book will strongly disagree.

Pick this book up for it’s funny stories, pick it up for it’s moving portrayal of parenting when your divorced and remarried, or pick it up for the creative ways that dad do things just a bit differently when they are at home. What ever you reason you will be glad you picked this book up.

P.S. I was not given anything for this review, not even a free book. This is just a book i picked up and enjoyed and think that you would enjoy too.

Popularity: 4%

Book Review: It’s Either Her or Me by Ellie Slott Fisher

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It's Either Her or Me

For a man there is no more complicated dance then the one between your mother and you special lady, be that wife or Girlfriend. In Ellie Slott Fisher’s new book It’s Either Her or Me she endeavors to make sense of that dance from the perspective of all the dance partners and to help each of us out with steps. Fisher uses a mixture of personal experience, professional advice, and anecdotes from a number of mothers, sons, and significant others to help women on both ends of the relationship as well as the men caught in the middle.

As a son and a husband I have become all too familiar with the delicate relationship between my mother and my wife. Growing up my mother and I were close and until I met my wife we talked often and in depth. When Beautiful came along that relationship changed. The talks might have been just as often but the depth wasn’t the same. While this is a natural part of relationships that doesn’t make it any easier to go through for a mother that is used to having unfiltered access to her son. Early in our relationship Beautiful found herself being compared and contrasted with a woman who had known me much longer and knew me well. While the relationship between my mother and my wife is a good one there is always going to be an ebb and flow as both of them learn how to relate to each other while both loving me.

What Ellie Slott Fisher, who also wrote Mom There’s A Man In The Kitchen And He’s Wearing Your Robe: The Single Mother’s Guide to Dating Well Without Parenting Poorly and Dating For Dad’s: The Singe Father’s Guide to Dating Well Without Parenting Poorly, does well in It’s Either Her or Me is weave in some great advice through the stories of others. In Chapter 2:His Role, Fisher writes about William who confronts his mom and his wife on the growing tension in their relationship. While the confrontation is hard at first it leads to a much healthier relationship. William says “If I could do it over again I would do it differently, for one thing, I would act more enthusiastically to both sides of the relationship. That would have eased the tension.” By piecing the points out through these anecdotes the meat of the message sinks in a bit deeper. I found I could relate to a number of the sons in the book and that helped me understand the lessons better. I also appreciate the “Keepsakes” at the end of each chapter summarizing the take away points in clear concise language. While I love the story telling sometimes I like to just get the meat and Fisher does a great job of doing both in this book.

While the advice was strong and the stories helpful I felt at times like the chapters were repetitive. Points, like mothers needing to hold their tongue, and sons needing to ultimately be on their wife’s side were reiterated in almost every chapter. These are strong points and worth repeating but some of power is lost in the repetition.

I think the intended audience for the is book is the women involved in this power struggle and they will definitely get the most out of it, but I think there is a lot there for men to understand. I would recommend this book for any man experiencing tension between his mother and his wife. Even if you think everything is going well it is worth a read to pick up on potential problems and gain a healthy does of empathy for the women in your life. The dance is tough and the more we learn all the steps the less likely we are to step on any toes.

I will be giving away a copy of the book to a lucky winner that leaves a comment telling me about the relationship either between your wife and your mother (men), or you and your mother in law (women). You can also increase your chance of winning by doing any and all of the following:

  • Follow me on Twitter
  • Retweet this giveaway
  • Follow this blog on Facebook
  • Send me tickets to the Opening game of the Lakers – Thunder series with airfare included

Be sure to note in the comments each of the ways you have entered, though truth be told the Lakers tickets guarantees a win

All opinions expressed in this review are my own and not influenced in any way by the company. I was given a free copy of the book by Random House to review

Popularity: 4%