Category Archives: links

Links to great stuff out there in the interwebs

Simple Stylish Kids Furniture from Sodura

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Assembled by the boys

The UPS man knocked on the side door while the boys were waiting for him at the front. They hear the truck and know that something great is coming for them. The boxes are not always for them but they don’t really care. They just love the mystery of the package, and I have to admit I have the bug as well. Our latest side door package was a new stool from the Children’s Furniture outfit called Sodura. Sodura is a Louisville Kentucky company that makes high quality furniture with eco-friendly products. I was asked if I wanted to test out their wooden stool to get an idea of the stylish furniture they made and I took them up on the opportunity. The folks at Sodura are parents looking for functional style in their kids rooms just like I am and I was interested to see if the stool was as easy to assemble and as sturdy as promised. The boys and I gathered are tools and got started putting the stool together. Really I just made them do the building because as poor kids I thought they needed the work experience.

 

As you can see it was indeed easy to build and the stool looks great in the boy’s room. Check out Sodura’s website and track down a vendor near you. They really do make quality modern furniture that meets the high demands for form and function in stylish kid’s rooms.

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Great reads for the expecting father

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Have you experienced the panic of the pink plus sign on that home pregnancy test you bought six of just to be sure? Feel wholly unprepared for the responsibility of fatherhood but don’t want to seem like a flake by talking about it with someone? Worried about all the million things that aren’t ready and never will be no matter how much time you have? Well have I got a resource for you! Over at the must read site Father Apprentice there is a collection of material from fathers that have been where you are now and mined a few nuggets along the way. In most of the posts the dads are no more than a couple of pages ahead in this fatherhood journey, but they have a lot of treasures to share about the road ahead. What to look out for and avoid, and what to make sure you cherish in all the chaos. So head on over to Father Apprentice and watch the videos, read the pro tips on swaddling, and see that none of us have all the answers, just some things we’ve learned so far.

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Even Dads can raise awareness and end infant abuse

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As time passes we remember bits and pieces of early days of having kids and most of it lumps together to form bigger themes but one of the scenes I remember clearly is a night in the first or second month of Primo’s life when he would not stop crying. Beautiful tried to sooth him, I swaddled and shimmied and shooshed all around the room. We took shorter and shorter shifts becoming frustrated by the impotent felling of holding such small thing making such a loud and piercing noise and becoming more and more aware at how powerless we were to fix the situation. We snapped at each other when one would offer a suggestion and I may have even cried in the corner of Primo’s room while he screamed in his bed. It is an awful feeling running out of solutions and having to just bathe in the cries of your young child.  We knew this was normal. We read the books, heard the stories, read the great websites like this one and still it was almost overwhelming not to able to make it better for our little boy.

As a dad I wanted to fix the problem but this was a situation where there was no identifiable fix. That whole helpless uncommunicative thing with babies makes it tough for them to effectively tell us what is wrong and even as we pick up on the easy things like dirty diapers and hungry kids there are still other ailments we don’t know about. I want parents and especially dads to know that this is normal. It sucks balls to go through but it is normal. You need to stay calm and tap into reservations of patience that you never had to use before. There will be times when you need to put the baby down and go into another room to recharge. When you feel that frustration building it is so important that you find a release for it away from the baby. Four times every day a baby is shaken or abused and it is not always some horrible parent doing the shaking. We would like to think that this is an issue somewhere else but we have all felt the frustration and powerless feelings that lead to shaking a baby. I have anyway. I have had those feelings bubble up to the surface while holding both of my boys and it is a scary feeling.  We all need to find tips for dealing with these feelings away from our kids so that we protect them by taking care of ourselves. There are some great tips here for when you feel your patience drying up.

You can also help by spreading the word about The Period of Purple crying and getting involved with Click for Babies to help educate parents about Shaken Baby Syndrome and getting involved locally. Click for Babies has a knitting program going on in Oregon:

Knit or crochet from 5 to 50 purple baby caps using soft baby friendly yarn and send them by mid-October to:

CLICK for Babies

c/o Volunteer Services EH1073

The Children’s Hospital at Legacy Emanuel

2801 N Gantenbein Ave. Portland, OR 97227

Now I am not a knitter at all but I am going to try my hand at knitting some caps so can you do it too? Let’s spread the word and help end infant abuse.



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Summer Camp for the animals with the animals

			
						

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Yesterday the boys and I headed up the hill to the Oregon Zoo for a preview of the Summer Camps going on now through September 2. We had the opportunity to learn about the different camps offered, eat some tasty snacks, make a couple of art projects, and see a hedgehog and ferret close up. With train and dinosaur tickets as well we ended up spending most of the day at the Zoo and the Washington Park play structure having a great time. Primo loved interacting with the camp counselors and I think that he would do really well at an all day camp.


There are eight camps for the different age groups ranging from four year olds to kids in seventh and eight grade and the camps compliment the Portland Public school focuses for each grade. While science and the Zoo are natural connections the camps are more than just scientific observation. There is a focus on art through crafts, songs, and songs as well as exercise and exploration. At our weekly Thursday night dinner last night my friend Jesse remembered fondly his experience at Zoo camp in Santa Barbara when he was five.


If you are looking for things to do in Portland for your school aged kids consider the Summer Camps at the Zoo. We are definitely going to try and find a way to get Primo signed up, we just need to convince the grandparents it’s a good idea to help with the cost.


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The Fresh Air Fund

			
						

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Living in Portland we have easy access to amazing parks and nature preservers but we are also minutes away from streams, rivers, and forests for the boys to explore and engage. Not all kids are lucky enough to have that space to interact with nature and find adventure at the edges of civilization. The Fresh Air Fund is a program set up to help get kids out of the city and into back yards for such simple pleasures as:




    

  • Laughing in the sunshine
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  • Catching fireflies
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  • Riding bicycles
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  • Learning to swim
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  • Running barefoot through the grass
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  • Gazing at the stars on moonlit nights
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  • Building sandcastles
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  • Making new friends
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  • Simple pleasures of life away from the inner-city
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Right now they are looking for host families in the North East United States to host kids as well as people around the country to help support this great cause. If you or someone you know can help please go to the linked site and get plugged in.




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Clearing the clutter to unlock creativity

			
						

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Spring is gone and all the spring cleaning projects we meant to do are probably still not done. Those that were finished already need redoing, like my garage of perpetual chaos. No matter how often I organize, clean, and clear stuff it quickly reverts to the black hole it once was. Sometimes it feel futile to start again but I know that isn’t true. There are all the basic reasons for keeping it clean (saftey, ease in finding things, making space) as well as some we don’t think about too often. A clean and clutter filled space fosters creativity. When we have an organized work space we are better equipped to not only do our work but to innovate as well. The same is true for kids spaces where toys can and art supplies can overwhelm a small space like our house. Periodically going through and clearing the clutter helps us see what it is that we have and provides space for the kids to fill in the story with their imagination. Our family has a policy of a finite amount of toys that the boys have and when more toys are added then something needs to be done with others to make room. Some toys are sold at our garage sale, others donated to places like Goodwill, and special toys are set aside for those friends that they think would really love that toy. We are trying to get the boys to think about what it means to have enough, and what it means to share that special toy with that special person. We also want to make sure that the amount of toys the kids have doesn’t overwhelm their own imagination and by pruning the toy pile we make sure the props don’t overtake the story.


This summer, in partnership with Out Growing In, we are excited to offer some free tips on how you can clear the clutter in space. Through out the month of July there will be tips each day as well a free workshop on how to get started from Author Lorrie Marrero. There will also be a free workshop from the Car Seat Lady Dr. Alisa Baer with tips answers to all your car seat questions. Head over to the Clear the clutter site to get signed up for either or both of the workshops and learn how you can win prizes through out the month.  You can also connect on Facebook to get even more tips. Whether you are making room, selling stuff you no longer need, or just simplifying your space we can also do with some tips on clearing the clutter this summer. Get started today with by going to the links above and let’s turn our Spring cleaning intentions into Summer realities.


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Dads still undervalued in the parenting economy

			
						

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We think these numbers are funny


Every year we see the numbers on the value of an at home parent. Over at Salary.com they did it on Mother’s day so thought they would also give the Stay at Home Dads a value as well but the numbers didn’t add up. Apparently at home moms are worth $115,000 a year while at home dads would be a little more than half that number bringing in $60,000 themselves. That’s a pretty big discrepancy but before you blame Salary.com it’s important to note that these numbers are based on the same amount of money per hour, the moms just say they spend 96 hours a week on the job, while dads peg the number around 53 hours. Working moms say they spend 56 hours on the parenting job so apparently a working mom is more valuable than a stay at home dad when it comes to a fair paycheck.


Why the difference then? I was quoted in the article with a theory of my own:


I believe, on average, stay-at-home dads see working moms as a valued partner and so dads only count the hours they are alone with their kids,” Rohl said. “But on average, stay-at-home moms count all the time they’re with the kids no matter who’s there. Even if their husbands are home, the idea is moms are still working and on the job. I don’t think that accurately reflects what’s really happening.


What do you think is the reason for the difference in the numbers? Do dads really not spend the same amount of time parenting as moms do, even stay at home dads? Do moms overvalue the time they spend or do dads undervalue the time they spend? I would love to get some thoughts on this.


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Unsolicited parenting Tip #97: Get connected

			
						

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Being a stay at home parent can feel like an isolating job quicker than you would expect. When it’s just you int he kids every day for most of the day you start to lose the ability to have conversations bigger than explaining why your three year old can’t walk to the end of the front walk and pee in the street. “But daddy there’s a drain right there!” When you get into adult company all your material is geared for the toddler and up set and you quickly realize that you are a terrible bore. At least that is my experience as a stay at home dad with a five and three year old. To counter this, and to find more support and information I have connected with a couple of great parenting groups both locally and nationally. Below are a couple fo the groups I’ve found to keep me sane and to help build a bigger parenting community.


Portland Dads Yahoo Group - This is an online group of active and engaged dads in the Portland Oregon area that get together for days at the zoo, soaks at the local pool, and hikes throughout the week. Anyone can post an event and the emails go out to all the parents on the list. I have met up with a couple of dads at the zoo to walk around, chat, and provide some interesting new friends for the boys. Every once in a while there is also a Dads night out event for some beer tasting and comparing battle wounds. The online forum has provided some great conversation digging deeper into gender roles and parenting tips from men that care about being more than just the cliche picture of dads.


Mamananda Yahoo Group – This is another local online message board but the audience is mostly moms in the North Portland neighborhoods. What I love about this group, apart form the hyper local nature, is the questions and discussions that come out of the message boards. Whether is it is socialization or a greater comfort level women tend to be more open to asking for help with the parenting struggles they are going through. What do I do about my biting kid, How can we encourage our toddler to sleep longer, What to do about a partner not participating in the raising the kids? These are the types of questions that come up and the answers are many and usually diverse.


At Home Dad - This is a national group of stay at home dads, work at home dads, and any other type of dads that want to engage more on topics of parenting, relationships, and professional issues. This is my trade union so to speak. The dads on this board are experiencing parenting and dealing with the same types of issues I go through as a male in a typically female world. More than anything I find a sense of community and feeling that I am not alone in reading and responding to the topics at this site. I think that’s important in any job but really great for at home parents.


These are a couple of the groups that I have found to foster a greater sense of connection and community for me as a parent. While a couple of these groups are local like the Portland Dads group, or hyper local like Mamanada, these types of groups are available all over the place. With a little online search you will find your local groups and get plugged in to a bigger community with similar parenting experiences. We all need to fight against the isolation and mono-culture that comes with parenting and connect with others because it’s good for us as parents and it is good for the kids too. My theory is that fulfilled parents make better parents. Where have you found community as parents?


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World’s Greatest TV Dad

			
						

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Clear eyes, full hearts!


For a long time the image of dad on most TV shows was the bumbling idiot or the detached authoritarian. That picture has seen some changes as more and more dads have filled different roles. While stereo types are slow the change it is becoming harder to reconcile the image of dads on TV with the image we see every day in the schools, parks, and local neighborhoods. There are some great images of dads being portrayed in primetime and to get to the bottom of who the best dad on TV is Man of The House is hosting a bracket style breakdown. You can vote on the match ups each week as the good dads advance and the stereotypes go home.


As a stay at home dad I think I’m a bit tougher on the fathers in the competition. Both Beautiful and I had strong caring dads that were always there for us. They could build bridges, run marathons, work hard, and cry at a good movie. Neither of our fathers hid their love for us and that has had huge influence on our own parenting style. Now a dad myself I try to emulate the best traits from both men: being strong and capable, open and honest, loving and nurturing, and making sure that they always know how much I love them and their mother.


When apply that same criteria to the dads in the Man of The House braket there is a clear winner and a character that has inspired me for the last six years: Coach Eric Taylor from Friday Night lights. Having already finished the last season I was sad to see this picture of not only a good dad but a great marriage come to an end. Friday Night Lights was one of the rare shows that showed a successful marriage lived out. I can’t understand why this show didn’t find an audience but I’m grateful that the network kept it around for as long as it did. Coach Taylor was the father of two girls and about 300 boys as coach of 5 seasons of High School Football. He was encouraging and tough, but admitted when he was wrong. He sacrificed for his family without compromising when it came to important lessons or showing love. There is so much that is fantastic about the show Friday Night lights but chief among them is Eric and Tammy Taylor.


So that is my pick, what is yours? Head over to the Man of The House site and vote for the World’s Greatest TV Dad each week. I’m interested to see how this plays out with the match ups each week and who the Cinderella dad will be. Also drop me a comment to let me know who you think is the Greatest TV Dad.


“I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour campaign by Dad Central Consulting on behalf of P&G and received promotional items to thank me for taking the time to participate.”


 


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Great joints in St. Johns for kids

			
						

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We have lived in the St. Johns neighborhood of North Portland for almost a year now and in that time we have found some great places to get out and about with the kids. As with any neighborhood in Portland there are parks around every corner and great streets for biking around town. The places that we have really loved are the one where we can grab a bite or some entertainment and if that’s what your looking for here are a couple of Gems:


St. Johns Theatre and Pub:  Another great McMenamins restaurant, this unique building was orginally on the other side of the river. It has been moved a couple of times and had many different occupants but now is a great place to grab dinner and a movie. On Tuesday nights they have special deals on a Burger, a movie, and a Pint for $6 and happy hour prices. The theatre has couches and tables to hold all your treats and the outside fire is a nice place sit on cool spring nights. We have gone for movie nights, caught a Timbers game there on the big screen, and enjoyed lunches with Beautiful sitting up in the balcony with all the hanging lamps. Great beer, good food, and unique atmosphere.


Giralsole: This new Brick oven fired pizza joint is a nice addition to downtown St. johns. They have a large play area for kids and an inexpensive menu full of tasty options. The pizzas are thin crust crunchy pies with a smokey taste from the brick oven. The boys immediately join the other kids there in the play area and always take time to stand at the bar and watch the pizzas cook. Jars of beer and large bottles of water on tables made from old doors lend a laid back southern vibe to this fun place. They aren’t open on Mondays so don’t try and meet your wife there for lunch on Monday when she’s having a rough day, it will only make it worse. I mean, not that it happened to us, I’m just saying.


East Side Deli: This is a new Deli in space formerly occupied by the amazing Red bike Cafe and so I didn’t want to like it. They had nothing to do with Red bike going under but it still felt wrong to go there. Huge sandwiches and hot dogs for great prices helped me get over it quickly. You come in and grab a menu and a pen and build your perfect Dagwood along with most of the nine to fivers in the neighborhood. They are hoping at lunch time and for good reason. The Roast beef is great, a barometer for great deli’s from beautiful’s point of view, and the hot dogs provide ample opportunity for creativity. It’s hard to get a table inside for lunch but if you do you will see some great images of the St. Johns bridge burned into the tops.


Other Places we love:


Signal Pizza


John Street Cafe


St. John Cinema


 


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